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MARKED DOWN - During a break from the high stakes meeting between President Trump, Volodymyr Zelensky, and a bevy of NATO leaders, the President led a brief tour of his latest addition to the White House, a gift shop. Photos of the shop showed a selection of MAGA hats and other typical tourism trinkets (coffee mugs, tee shirts and such). Because the stakes of the summit were so high, the tour ended quickly, leaving the NATO leaders and the public without a complete view of all the shop has to offer, never mind the shop’s current “deep discount” Summer Sale items.
Here's a broader look at the Gift Shop’s catalog.
The Lock ‘Em Up Brooch features necklaces which display a locket containing “original Alligator Alcatraz dirt” and a description, signed by the President, which certifies that the small clump of earth came from the excavated land on which the administration’s new immigrant prison is built. (Limited availability, $225.00*).
Rose Petals from the old White House Rose Garden designed by Jacquiline Kennedy. The petals have been encased in glass medallions suitable for use as a brooch or necklace. Because the original Kennedy Rose Garden is now a slab of white concrete, these blossoms are extremely rare. ($350.00*).
“VIP (Very Impressive President) Seating at your choice of venues. Option One: Reserved Orchestra level seating at the inaugural Trump Talent Show produced and hosted by Donald Trump in Trump Palace, formerly the Kennedy Center for Performing Arts. This option includes a commemorative program signed by the President ($2,500 per seat).
Option Two: A Table for 6 at the premiere dedication and celebration of the White House’s newest addition, the DJT Ballroom. This option includes a catered dinner – “fresh Big Mac’s, Crispy Fries, Natural American Sugar Coke” – including golden take-home plastic mugs featuring an autographed image of the President. ($250,000 per person, $1,500,000 total).
Trump Tattoos: Among the most popular items in the shop, these tats are suitable for display on biceps, chests, or ankles; they feature Donald Trump in a variety of settings. Purchasers can proudly display one or more images of the President in the dressing room at Miss Teen America, Donald Trump and Jeffrey Epstein in a warm embrace, Donald Trump and E. Jean Carroll holding hands, and Donald Trump surrounded by golf tournament trophies. Note: these transferable images, like the events which inspired them, are not permanent; eventually, they vanish. $35.00 each*.
*The listed price on these items does not include shipping and handling; add $78.25 per item when ordering. Prices subject to change as the administration imposes new tariffs on items not manufactured in the United State; only McDonald’s meals are tariff-free. Checks payable to Donald J. Trump.
Buy Now – Like quality public education and vital scientific research, Summer Sale Prices Expire Soon.
(David M. Hamlin is the author of the Emily Winter mysteries and his latest novel, Murder in Tolland. You can find these works, as well as two free short stories, at www.dmhwrites.com.)
