ACCORDING TO LIZ - With apologies to the real Superstar… who predated Trump by a couple of millennia.
Look at all my trials and tribulations
Journalistic fakery gone wild.
My people love me,
Ya gotta agree.
When back, I’ll get those fraudsters fired.
Blameless, am I of accusations.
Can’t help it if women pursue me.
A sexier man
Never walked this land
But fickle c*nts demand bribery.
Always knew I'd be el Presidente,
Knew I’d buy the White House someday,
Blessed by powerful friends
To solve all my problems
And forever make these witch-hunts go away.
As President, I had all the power.
Why shouldn’t it come with me when I go?
Never crossed any line;
These papers are mine.
So tell those prosecutors to F-O.
Georgia-smorgia, tell me what’s the furor?
Minor alterations were all I asked.
State officials worked for me,
Don’t you all agree?
But those f**kers just weren’t up to the task.
My MAGA fans have now been persecuted
Fighting for my rights on January six.
Their wanting me back
Put my life back on track.
But they were trapped by Biden’s evil tricks.
Violation of my rights is undisputed,
Spurious claims of fraud and tax evasion
Against businesses I maintain.
To stop my campaign
And emasculate my reputation.
Always knew I'd be el Presidente,
Back in the Oval Office, with burgers and fries.
I will ascend
My problems at an end,
MAGA hero, despite those a-holes’ lies.
As sung by the MAGA Chorus Line, with a shout-out to Andrew Lloyd Weber:
You sad pathetic fool - see where you've brought us to
Our ideals die around us, all because of you
But the saddest cut of all
Someone has to turn you in
Like a common criminal, like a wounded animal
A jaded mandarin
A jaded mandarin
Like a jaded faded, faded jaded, jaded mandarin
(Liz Amsden is a contributor to CityWatch and an activist from Northeast Los Angeles with opinions on much of what goes on in our lives. She has written extensively on the City's budget and services as well as her many other interests and passions. In her real life she works on budgets for film and television where fiction can rarely be as strange as the truth of living in today's world.)
